Blessed2Bless by Steve Klusmeyer

      Old Geezer Exam
      Author Unknown

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      The Exam:

      After making your choices, hold the mouse-pointer over Answer following each question to see the correct answer. Keep track of your total number of correct answers to see if you are Older Than Dirt. . . . Don't Cheat, I'm Watching. (Answers are also printed at the bottom of the page.)

      1. In the 1940s, '50s, and early '60s, where were automobile headlight dimmer switches located?
        image of Classic Car
        a. On the floor shift knob
        b. On the floor board, to the left of the clutch
        c. Next to the horn
        Answer

      2. The bottle top of a Royal Crown Cola bottle had holes in it. For what was it used?
        a. To capture lightning bugs
        b. To sprinkle clothes before ironing
        c. Large salt shaker
        Answer

      3. Why was having milk delivered a problem in northern winters?
        a. Cows got cold and wouldn't produce milk
        b. Ice on highways forced delivery by dog sled
        c. Milkmen left deliveries outside of front doors and the milk would freeze.
        Answer

      4. What was the popular chewing gum named for a game of chance?
        image of Pack of Chewing Gum
        a. Blackjack
        b. Gin
        c. Craps!
        Answer

      5. What method did women use to look as if they were wearing stockings when none were available due to rationing during W.W.II?
        a. Suntan
        b. Leg painting
        c. Wearing slacks
        Answer

      6. What postwar car turned automotive design on its ear when you couldn't tell whether it was coming or going?
        a. Studebaker
        b. Nash Metro
        c. Tucker
        Answer

      7. Which was a popular candy when you were a kid?
        image of Candy
        a. Strips of dried peanut butter
        b. Chocolate licorice bars
        c. Wax coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside
        Answer

      8. How was Butch wax used?
        a. To stiffen a flattop haircut so it stood up
        b. To make floors shiny and prevent scuffing
        c. On the wheels of roller skates to prevent rust
        Answer

      9. Before inline skates, how did you keep your roller skates attached to your shoes?
        image of Skate
        a. With clamps, tightened by a skate key
        b. Woven straps that crossed the foot.
        c. Long pieces of twine
        Answer

      10. As a kid, what was considered the best way to reach a decision?
        a. Consider all the facts
        b. Ask Mom
        c. Eeny-meeny-miney-mo
        Answer

      11. What was the most dreaded disease in the 1940s?
        a. Smallpox
        b. AIDS
        c. Polio
        Answer

      12. "I'll be down to get you in a ________, Honey"
        a. SUV
        b. Taxi
        c. Streetcar
        Answer

      13. What was the name of Caroline Kennedy's pet pony?
        image of Pony
        a. Old Blue
        b. Paint
        c. Macaroni
        Answer

      14. What was a Duck-and-Cover Drill?
        a. Part of the game of hide and seek
        b. What you did when your Mom called you in to do chores
        c. Hiding under your desk, and covering your head with your arms in an A-bomb drill
        Answer

      15. What was the name of the Indian Princess on the Howdy Doody show?
        a. Princess Summerfallwinterspring
        b. Princess Sacajewea
        c. Princess Moonshadow
        Answer

      16. What did all the really savvy students do when mimeographed tests were handed out in school?
        a. Immediately sniffed the purple ink, as this was believed to get you high
        b. Made paper airplanes to see who could sail theirs out the window
        c. Wrote another pupil's name on the top, to avoid your failure
        Answer

      17. Why did your Mom shop in stores that gave Green Stamps with purchases?
        a. To keep you out of mischief by licking the backs, which tasted like bubble gum
        b. They could be put in special books and redeemed for various household items
        c. They were given to the kids to be used as stick-on tattoos
        Answer

      18. Praise the Lord, and pass the _________?
        a. Meatballs
        b. Dames
        c. Ammunition
        Answer

      19. What was the name of the singing group that made the song "Cabdriver" a hit?
        image of Rock-N-Roll Group
        a. The Mills Brothers
        b. The Supremes
        c. The Esquires
        Answer

      20. Who left his heart in San Francisco?
        a. Tony Bennett
        b. Zavier Cugat
        c. George Gershwin
        Answer

      To Start Over:
        then Return to Question One.

      Your Score:

      17-20 Correct:
        You are not only older than dirt, but obviously gifted with mind bloat. Now if you could only find your glasses.

      12-16 Correct:
        Not quite dirt yet, but your mind is definitely muddy.

      0-11 Correct:
        You are a sad excuse for a geezer or you are younger than springtime!


      The Answers:

      1. b) On the floor, to the left of the clutch. Hand controls, popular in Europe, took till the late '60s to catch on.

      2. b) To sprinkle clothes before ironing. Who had a steam iron?

      3. c) Cold weather caused the milk to freeze and expand, popping the bottle top.

      4. a) Blackjack Gum.

      5. b) Special makeup was applied, followed by drawing a seam down the back of the leg with eyebrow pencil.

      6. a) 1946 Studebaker.

      7. c) Wax coke bottles containing super-sweet colored water.

      8. a) Wax for your flat top (butch) haircut.

      9. a) With clamps, tightened by a skate key, which you wore on a shoestring around your neck.

      10. c) Eeny-meeny-miney-mo.

      11. c) Polio. At the beginning of August, swimming pools were closed. Movies and other public gathering places were also closed to try to prevent spread of the disease.

      12. b) Taxi. Better be ready by half-past eight!

      13. c) Macaroni.

      14. c) Hiding under your desk, and covering your head with your arms in an A-bomb drill.

      15. a) Princess Summerfallwinterspring. She was another puppet.

      16. a) Immediately sniffed the purple ink to get a high.

      17. b) Put in a special stamp book, they could be traded for household items at the Green Stamp store.

      18. c) Ammunition, and we'll all be free.

      19. a) The Mills Brothers (not The Inkspots, as stated on this exam by other web sites and e-mails).

      20. a) Tony Bennett, and he sounds just as good today. (Or bad, depending on your taste.)

      -Author unknown

      -from Bill's Punch Line (found circulating around the web)
        submitted by Tom Ervin




      Copyright © 2002 ... to infinity, and beyond — Steve Klusmeyer. All rights reserved.