A Dog's New Year's Resolutions
Fun for Dog Lovers

A Dog's New Year's Resolutions

1. I will not play tug-of-war with Daddy's underwear when he's on the can.
   
   
2. I will remember the garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.
   
   
3. I will not suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
   
   
4. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.
   
   
5. I will shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.
   
   
6. I will not eat the cat's food before or after he eats it.
   
   
7. I will stop trying to find new places on the carpet when I am about to throw up.
   
   
8. I will not throw up in the car.
   
   
9. I will not roll on dead things.
   
   
10. I will stop considering the cat's litter box as a cookie jar.
    
    
11. I will not wake up Mommy by putting my cold, wet nose up her bottom end.
    
    
12. I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.
    
    
13. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think that I am hemorrhaging.
    
    
14. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside.
    
    
15. I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of anyone who is sitting on the can.
    
    
16. We do not have a doorbell. Therefore, I will not bark each time I hear one on the television.
    
    
17. I will not steal my Mommy's underwear out of the laundry basket and then dance all over the back yard with them.
    
    
18. I will remember the sofa is not a face towel and neither are Mommy's & Daddy's laps.
    
    
19. I will remember my head does not belong in the refrigerator.
    
    
20. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mommy's driver's license and car registration.